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Old Fri, Jun-08-2018, 09:18:54 PM   #221
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Old Sat, Jun-09-2018, 12:07:15 AM   #222
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^
Honestly, you don't even see that crap in movies.
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Old Mon, Jan-07-2019, 08:30:35 PM   #223
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https://nypost.com/2018/11/16/teens-...rce=FCFacebook
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Old Mon, Jan-07-2019, 09:29:32 PM   #224
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well gents, it's about that time of the day for me. who else is down for some bloody mary's?
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Old Thu, Dec-05-2019, 07:28:45 PM   #225
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Quote:
This Tuesday afternoon a Florida man covered himself in Vaseline and ran naked through a southern Florida mall. It took police 45 minutes to catch the man. The mall is closed for the rest of the day, but the memories will last forever.

“I was looking for new underwear to buy when all of a sudden I heard screaming of a distraught man,” a local woman said. “When I looked up, I saw an oily naked man running through the mall screaming profanities and how Elizabeth Warren is going to tax him.”

The man ran in and out of stores screaming at shoppers and workers about how Elizabeth Warren was going to tax him and take all his money. Police arrived on scene promptly.

“When the police arrived all hell broke loose,” a Florida woman stated.

The man was nearly impossible to catch. Since he was covered in Vaseline, he was able to slip out of the hands of the officers with ease and slide under their legs on his belly like a greased-up pig.

“I had him in my hands and he just slipped right out of them,” a police officer stated. “When I caught him for that split second, he headbutted me, grunted like a potbelly pig about to eat a bag of popcorn and slipped right under my legs.”

After the close encounter with the police, the Florida man ran into a national women’s clothing store.

“I wasn’t sure what was going on,” a cashier at the national women’s clothing store said. “He jumped right up on the counter and took a fresh dump right inside of the cash register. The fresh dump smelled like the time my degenerate brother put roadkill in the microwave for 30 minutes as an April Fool’s joke.”

When the police made it into the national women’s clothing store, they tackled the Florida man to only have him slip away yet again due to his greased-up Vaseline body.

“I was about to give up and just quit my job,” a police officer stated. “I definitely don’t get paid enough to chase naked men covered in Vaseline, let alone one’s who just took a fresh one in a cash register.”

When all was thought to be lost, the police officer found the Florida man passed out inside a store that sells mattresses. The man was cuddled up on a brand-new mattress holding a teddy bear. The mattress is now listed on eBay for $10,000 as Vintage Vaseline Florida Man Mattress.

Another Florida man was arrested that afternoon at the mall for stealing the money out of the cash register where the fresh dump laid.

The Vaseline covered Florida man is being held in the local jail for disturbing the peace and nudity.

If you liked what you read. Consider following our Facebook or Twitter Page. You may also enjoy some of our more popular posts that other readers have liked:

A Florida man chases people around Walmart with fresh turd from toilet
Florida man arrested for launching filled diapers from catapult at moving cars
8 sexual images of your favorite U.S. Presidents
Taxi driver states favorite part of his job is running people over
If you get a text from this number, never respond to it
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https://thestonkmarket.com/2019/10/2...pD16D-t6ftXfOg
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Old Thu, Dec-05-2019, 07:28:45 PM   #226
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Default Re: The Official Bizarre News Thread


Quote:
This Tuesday afternoon a Florida man covered himself in Vaseline and ran naked through a southern Florida mall. It took police 45 minutes to catch the man. The mall is closed for the rest of the day, but the memories will last forever.

“I was looking for new underwear to buy when all of a sudden I heard screaming of a distraught man,” a local woman said. “When I looked up, I saw an oily naked man running through the mall screaming profanities and how Elizabeth Warren is going to tax him.”

The man ran in and out of stores screaming at shoppers and workers about how Elizabeth Warren was going to tax him and take all his money. Police arrived on scene promptly.

“When the police arrived all hell broke loose,” a Florida woman stated.

The man was nearly impossible to catch. Since he was covered in Vaseline, he was able to slip out of the hands of the officers with ease and slide under their legs on his belly like a greased-up pig.

“I had him in my hands and he just slipped right out of them,” a police officer stated. “When I caught him for that split second, he headbutted me, grunted like a potbelly pig about to eat a bag of popcorn and slipped right under my legs.”

After the close encounter with the police, the Florida man ran into a national women’s clothing store.

“I wasn’t sure what was going on,” a cashier at the national women’s clothing store said. “He jumped right up on the counter and took a fresh dump right inside of the cash register. The fresh dump smelled like the time my degenerate brother put roadkill in the microwave for 30 minutes as an April Fool’s joke.”

When the police made it into the national women’s clothing store, they tackled the Florida man to only have him slip away yet again due to his greased-up Vaseline body.

“I was about to give up and just quit my job,” a police officer stated. “I definitely don’t get paid enough to chase naked men covered in Vaseline, let alone one’s who just took a fresh one in a cash register.”

When all was thought to be lost, the police officer found the Florida man passed out inside a store that sells mattresses. The man was cuddled up on a brand-new mattress holding a teddy bear. The mattress is now listed on eBay for $10,000 as Vintage Vaseline Florida Man Mattress.

Another Florida man was arrested that afternoon at the mall for stealing the money out of the cash register where the fresh dump laid.

The Vaseline covered Florida man is being held in the local jail for disturbing the peace and nudity.

If you liked what you read. Consider following our Facebook or Twitter Page. You may also enjoy some of our more popular posts that other readers have liked:

A Florida man chases people around Walmart with fresh turd from toilet
Florida man arrested for launching filled diapers from catapult at moving cars
8 sexual images of your favorite U.S. Presidents
Taxi driver states favorite part of his job is running people over
If you get a text from this number, never respond to it
If you really enjoyed what you read, consider sharing the article! We would greatly appreciate it.
https://thestonkmarket.com/2019/10/2...pD16D-t6ftXfOg


Quote:
A Florida man in Dade county was arrested for launching diapers filled with turds and pee at moving cars on a highway with a homemade catapult he built in his garage. Authorities state the man launched over 60 filled diapers.

“I was driving my car to the office this cool morning when all of a sudden a diaper exploded over my windshield,” a local Florida man stated. “The diaper hit my windshield so hard I almost crashed the car. Splattered turds and pee were everywhere. I had to pull over.”

The Florida man spent the last 30 days filling the diapers himself with his own excrements. Once he had enough diapers filled, he took his homemade catapult to an overpass and began to launch the diapers at moving cars.

“It was quite the sight to see,” a Florida woman said. “I immediately pulled over when I saw diapers flying through the sky.”

Authorities stated the homemade catapult could launch the diapers at more than 70 miles per hour.

“The catapult was quite the ingenious contraption,” a police officer stated. “I’ve never seen a weapon like that in my entire 30 years on the police force.”

The catapult was five feet high and weighted over 50 pounds. It could launch diapers a quarter of a mile.

In total the man launched 63 filled diapers at moving cars. The man was arrested and is waiting trail for endangering the public and assault with a deadly weapon. He faces up to life in prison.
Quote:
Florida woman claims wind blew cocaine into her purse
FORT PIERCE, Fla. (AP) — Authorities say a Florida woman is blaming a windy day for the cocaine that police found in her purse.

WPLG reported Kennecia Posey was one of two passengers in a car stopped by Fort Pierce police in late March. Police say an officer smelled marijuana and that, after searching the car, cocaine and marijuana in separate bags were found inside a purse Posey had on her lap.

Authorities say they questioned Posey about the drugs. According to the police report, Posey responded: “It’s a windy day. It must have flown through the window and into my purse.”

Posey was charged with a felony count of cocaine possession and a misdemeanor count of marijuana possession. She was later released on bond.

It wasn’t immediately known if she has a lawyer.
https://www.abcactionnews.com/news/s...into-her-purse

Topless woman in custody after police say she stole mail truck, crashed into TriMet lift bus

Quote:
PORTLAND, Ore. – Friday morning, the Portland Police Department identified the woman who they say stole a mail truck and crashed it into a TriMet lift bus Thursday afternoon.

Monique Cortez-Munos, 23, is facing charges of possession of a stolen vehicle, attempting to elude a police officer, mail theft, unauthorized use of a vehicle, attempt to elude a police officer on foot, reckless driving, reckless arrest, interfering with a police officer, failure to perform duties of a driver for an injury accident, and failure to perform duties of a driver for property damage. She was booked in the Multnomah County Detention Center.

The driver of the lift bus was injured in the crash, but is expected to survive.

Officers responded to a report of a stolen vehicle at around 12:15 p.m. in the 16100 block of Southeast Alder Street.

Police say the woman stole the mail truck, then drove it north, hitting the bus near Northeast Wasco Street and Northwest 162nd Avenue. Then, she kept going.

Cortez-Munos reportedly lost control of the vehicle while going around a curve. The mail truck hopped a curb, drove over a small tree and hit a lamp post, causing the mail truck to roll. The truck came to a stop at the intersection of Northeast 155th Avenue and Northeast Fremont Street.

Police say Cortez-Munos ran 12 blocks, across Northeast Sandy Boulevard before she was taken into custody.

Investigators have not said how Cortez-Munos stole the truck, but they did say she appeared to be impaired. She was taken to a hospital before she was booked.

https://www.wtsp.com/article/news/we...arges/60522680

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/...*-shirt-876490

Last edited by EKaru; Thu, Dec-05-2019 at 07:37:25 PM.
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Old Thu, Dec-05-2019, 08:21:16 PM   #227
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Default Re: The Official Bizarre News Thread

I can't believe out of all those tags, not one of them is "Florida".
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Old Thu, Dec-05-2019, 08:37:22 PM   #228
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^
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Old Fri, Dec-06-2019, 05:18:07 AM   #229
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Aww, come on. Kind of cute, looks like fun and you know she's down for a good time, what could possibly go wrong?
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Discussing The Official Bizarre News Thread in the Off Topic Forum - Place to discuss this and that. Note: We also have "request to join" forums: Guns and Fitness.
(Threads/posts inside may contain material that is NSFW / offensive) at BMW M3 Forum.com (E30 M3 | E36 M3 | E46 M3 | E92 M3 | F80/X)